Mediocre Bad Guys
by jules456
Summary: Summer Roberts has just discovered that life is never how you expected it to be. Now years later at 23 would Seth even remember her? Would he forgive her for what she did to him? Did he still love her? Could her save her?
1. Well don't give me no comic book

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Hey! I am pretty excited about this story. You have to R&R and tell me what you think.

XOXO HaLeY 

Mediocre Bad Guys

Prologue: "Well don't give me no comic book sad looks no more"

Summer Roberts sat at her vanity helplessly trying to cover up the bruises around her eyes. He usually hit her where it wouldn't hurt, but lately he had been particularly careless about it. Something about that made her uneasy… Why did she stay? Why not? What was there to go home to?

She was a 23 year old woman that in her life time had experienced much more than many 80 year olds. Sure she and Marissa would still talk on the phone occasionally, but it wasn't the same… they aren't in high school anymore… Marissa was with Ryan, and she was with Todd… And Seth… Seth Cohen. Her first love, … her only love. He was the only thing that could bring a smile to her face now a day… Well besides Seth… other Seth that is. Little Seth, she and Todd's two year old son.

She and Todd met at Berkley right after college… Marissa and Ryan ended up attending college on the east coast and then both doing a year over seas.

Summer looked around the dive of an apartment that she had with Todd… It was a one roomer in a tenement building down in LA. Of course it wasn't the house of her dreams but it had to do… the sink even occasionally worked… well if she was lucky… On many occasions she would go to the laundry room in the downstairs of the building and fill up a bucket or two, and carry it up, with Little Seth following close behind. She would then dump the water in the tub and then toss Little Seth in the tub. If times were really bad that week she found herself doing the wash in the same water.

What happened to the days where the only care Summer Roberts had was what was happening on the next episode of "The Valley?" Sometimes if she closed her eyes long and hard she could almost go back to the days that she Ryan, Marissa and Seth spent upon the Newport boardwalk. She often got lost in her memories. It was then when Todd got the most angry… When dinner was not on the table by the time he got home. If Little Seth wasn't doing what he wanted… 

Summer had learned how to block punches well, especially for a considerably small woman... If you didn't know any better one may now think she is from Chino. And yet she was still no match for Todd… The father of her child…

Todd had taken to calling "Little Seth", "Little Todd." Whenever she heard him call her son a miniature version of him it made her physically sick…

She wondered where Seth was… Was he married? Was he still the big goof ball that read comics and played video games from the time he woke up until he went to bed? Was he still the same little boy that had remembered a stupid poem she wrote back at grade school…? Would he be the one who she would run to when she was upset and wrap her up in a protective blanket of… Coheness? She didn't know, and it was all her fault. HER fault that she left. HER fault he would never talk to her again. HER fault that she was with an abuser-

Right then Todd came into the room…

"Hey." He said.

He was still dressed in his uniform from the auto park. He was wearing an orange jumpsuit and was caked in grease. He plopped down on the couch and grabbed the clicker to the TV and switched it on.

Had they had a nicer couch Summer would have told him to get his greasy ass off of it, but it was no use. That couch was gone from the beginning.

She remembered the days when they first met. She had worn make-up still back in those days, and done her hair up nicely… her nails were manicured… Now that she had no money, the little that she had went to Little Seth. She actually didn't mind. She loved her son more than life herself. Now her hair hung in a dull pony tail, and she wore baggy jeans with holes in the knees, and solid colored t-shirts.

"Um… Todd?" Summer said as she wiped down the kitchen counter with Little Seth on her hip…

"What?" Todd responded.

That tone… it was the same one that her father had used with her when she was a young girl and he had not wanted to be bothered by her…

__

Five year old Summer skipped into her fathers office.

"Look Daddy." She said holding up the badge that she had just received from her Dasiy troop.

He gave her a blank stare.

"I sold the most cookies." Summer explained.

"Nice honey." Her father said turning back to his computer.

"Daddy?" Summer asked on her way.

"What?" The same careless what came out of his mouth that did Todds today.

"Nothing." Summer said cowering out of her dads office.

Those were the days when she would go cry in her mothers lap… the days before her mother abandoned her…

Summer being caught in her day dream didn't respond to Todd.

"WHAT!" He said more irritated this time.

"It's just that… well, Seth needs more shoes…" Summer said continuing to clean the counter.

"No." Was all that he said not turning back to the TV.

Summer knew better than to mention she needed more shoes as well. She could almost feel the floor through the soles…

"I can't even squeeze him foot into them…" Summer said a little firmer

"Are you talking back to me." Todd said getting up from the couch, tossing the remote across the room.

"No…" She said turning to face him, backing up against the counter, still holding Little Seth… Summer suddenly got a burst of courage… but it turns out that that same courage is what usually got her into trouble… "Well I didn't make him on my own!" Summer said through gritted teeth.

It was then that a hand was raised above her head… she couldn't remember anymore after that…


	2. Please don't use those same excuses you'...

Chapter 1: "Please don't use those same excuses you've used before"

Summer woke up the next morning being able to feel her pulse in her head. She felt Todds arm carelessly laid across her. She hadn't remembered much after being hit. She looked down to see Little Seth sitting in the middle of the floor playing with a toy truck in silence. He knew not to make any noise when he woke up… it irritated Todd, …and when he was angry… well things weren't pretty…

She carefully slipped out from under his arm and crawled over to her son who just watched her as she approached.

"Hey honey." She said reaching out to pick him up.

Little Seth stared at her and said nothing. He didn't speak much. You could see everything that he felt in his dark brown eyes… He reached out and touched her face lightly… Summer winced.

"I'll be right back baby." Summer said sitting Little Seth back on the floor and heading to the bathroom.

She saw herself in the mirror for the first time since the night before… how was she supposed to react? It was her fault that this happened. It was all her fault. Summer quickly changed into a red tank-top and an old pair of jeans, put her hair down to cover the marks on her neck, and found her trade mark dark sun glasses…

"Do you want to head to the park?" Summer whispered to Little Seth as she re-entered the room.

His face lit up. Little Seth had a round face and light brown curly hair. The young boy had only two facial expressions. Sad or mischievous…

Summer slipped Little Seth into his overalls and a dinosaur shirt under it, and then they headed out to the park.

Summer watched Seth carefully as he played. He didn't go near the other children. He sat in the sand box and played alone. The same thing all the time. Summer could trust that he would stay there for awhile… that was until a squirrel came along.

Summer loved squirrels herself, but she would never admit it to anyone other than Cohen. They could get away from harm faster than you could imagine their little bodies could take them… that was until a car came and knocked them out and left them lying bloody in the street to be scraped off of the road by animal control.

__

"Mommy!" Five year old Summer banged on the bathroom door. "Mommy!" She called again.

She stood way up on her tip-toes to reach the door knob… The door slowly crept open… 

"Mommy?" Summer called again, but this time in a lower voice…

She looked at her bathtub… Why was the water red? Why was her mommy not moving? Maybe she was just taking a nap under water… right? 

Hours later Summers father found his little girl standing over her bathtub with her dead mother inside. Soon Summer was watching through the bars of the balcony as her mommy was being taken out in a black bag.

"Daddy?" Summer asked pulling on his dress pants.

"Don't touch my good pants. You have water and god knows what else on your hands." He said not looking down at his small child

Summer backed up from her father

"Better, now what were you asking?" He asked as the bag was now out of the door…

"How can mommy breathe in there?" Summer asked naively 

"She's not."

Summer pulled her jacket more tightly around herself. Anyone who was wearing a jacket in this weather was out of their mind… or getting beaten up by their boyfriend. Summer was broken out of her thoughts when she felt a pair of eyes on her… A woman had sat next to her on the bench.

"Hello." The woman said

"Hey." Summer said. Her mouth hurt from the cut in her lip when she spoke. Her voice came out like a little girls…

"I am Julie Turner." 

Summer didn't respond.

"I work at a clinic for women here in the city." Julie said

"That's nice." Summer said grabbing her back and going to retrieve her son. She could tell this woman... this "Julie", was watching her leave the park…

Summer had trouble balancing Little Seth on her bruised hip. She had to repeatedly shift him.

"Where the hell were you!" Todd yelled as she entered her apartment.

Summer panicked, she knew what was coming…

Summer lay on the floor, she felt purple and bruised from head to toe… Why had he done this to her. As she drifted in and out of consciousness she thought back to her Newport days… her pre-Todd days.

__

"Hey beautiful." Seth said coming up to her kissing her on the cheek.

"Ew Cohen. With the PDA's!" Summer said in her usual tone even though she was enjoying his attention.

"So I was thinking that we take the boat out this weekend." Seth said 

"Just the two of us?" Summer asked

"Well unless Marissa and Ryan happen to pull themselves out of the sack for a couple of hours…"

Summer turned to see her best friend making out with Ryan against the wall. 

Marissa… Summer remembered the first day she met her…

_Summers mom's funeral had come and gone. Her father went on more business trips than usual now, which left Summer alone with Janice, the nanny. If anyone asked Summer she rather would have a mother over a nanny, … but nobody had._

Summer sat on the swings alone watching the squirrels run around like they had no care in the world. Nobody approached Summer. She liked being all on her lonesome, much like Little Seth did. Then she noticed a girl, tall and skinny, with big green eyes standing across the playground staring at her. There was something about that girl, Summer thought.

The next thing that she knew the little girl was being yanked by some woman who was fixing the bow ties in her hair and adjusting her dress. And then the woman set her free. The girl seeming to want to get away from the woman walked across the playground which happened to be where Summer sat. 

The little girl sat on the swing next to her. She swung back and forth slowly. All of the other girls were being chased around by the boys, or playing with barbies, but not these two, they were angst and drama since the womb. Figure they would fine each other that first day on kindergarten.

The girl looked overwhelmed. Summer felt a little sorry for her. Summer herself didn't care about too much… except for her mommy. But daddy told her that her mommy was gone and wasn't coming back so stop crying.

The little girl kicked off her jelly sandals and let her little feet drag in the mulch under her feet.

Summer felt like she should say something.

"Hi." Summer said to the timid young girl.

"Hey." The little girl responded.

"My name is Summer."

"I'm Marissa." She said still looking down at the ground. Summer wondered why she was, maybe there was something interesting down there, so she did the same, which now caused this Marissa girl to look up, which caused Summer to look up.

Summer had a hard look to her. This little girl was invincible, but always had a worried look on her face. Her brow was always furrowed like there was always danger lurking. Marissa on the other hand had a sadness clouding her. Marissas hardships had made her sad and vulnerable, and Summers hard and cynical … They balanced each other out well, although they were both emotional train wrecks from the beginning.

A little boy ran over to them with a curly brow "Jew fro".

"Marissa check out this slug!" He said shoving it in the girls face excitedly.

Marissa said nothing as she looked at the slug in disgust. 

"Ew." Young Summer said slapping the slimy creature out of the boys hand.

The boy retreated to under a tree where he proceeded to dig with sticks as he watched Summer.

"That kid is weird." Summer commented.

"Seth." Marissa said.

"Huh?" Five year old Summer asked

"His name is Seth Cohen. He lives next to me." Marissa said. They both stared over at the boy who was staring right back at them… "My dad an' his mom are good friends." Marissa informed her new friend.

Summer watched this "Cohen", kid from across the playground. Some was different about him. Luckily Marissa didn't see her smile … but he saw it… and he was never going to forget it…

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R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!


	3. You told yourself so many times its okay

Chapter 3: "You told yourself so many times it's okay"

Summer never let Todd hit little Seth, not to say that he hadn't tried, but she always blocked it… always. She never tried to hard to think about what happened when she was knocked out. She just hoped that Todd knew better than to even try to lay a hand on her son.

When she floated back into consciousness this time she noticed that Todd wasn't there… He was probably working the late shift at the auto park.

The cut on Summers lip was chapped, she headed to her bag to get some chap stick… When she opened her bag she was surprised by what she found. Inside there was a brown paper bag. Summer opened it slowly and cautiously. Inside there was a fifty dollar bill, and a card for the LA womens shelter…

Summer couldn't believe it. That woman at the park probably slipped it in. Well on one side she could use the money.

"I don't need help from any womens shelter." She said tossing the card down. "I can do this on my own." She said

On the card it said "The first step is getting help. We are here to help you take it." 

Summer had never needed anyones help. She was stronger than anyone knew.

__

7 year old Marissa and Summer stood outside of their dance class.

"Are you sure your father is going to pick you up?" Mr. Cooper asked her

"Yes." Summer said firmly keeping her eyes on the road.

"Well he's running pretty late, I 'm sure he wouldn't mind if I just drove you home." Mr. Cooper tried to persuade the young girl.

"No." Summer said firmly. "He'll be here."

~ 1 hour later, Marissa and Summer sat on the step outside of the dance studio both swinging their feet slowly back and forth.

"You guys can just go. He will be here." Summer said

"I'm not going to leave you alone." Marissa said

"Why not?" Summer asked

"You're my best friend!" Marissa said to her.

Summer remembered when Mommy said that she wouldn't leave her… but she did. She left her for a bathtub full of red. She left her and swore she wouldn't… Although she didn't believe Marissa she would never let her know it. Marissa was sweet, but then again so was mommy.

An hour later her fathers car pulled up, and he beeped his horn.

"See, I told you that he would be here." Summer said hopping up, grabbing her dance bag.

Jimmy gave an unsure smile, that did not go unnoticed by Summer.

"By Marissa, bye Mr. Cooper." Summer said jumping into a black Mercedes as if nothing was wrong.

Marissa and Jimmy exchanged glances… from that moment forward she was under the Coopers wings. Although she would never admit it.

"I don't need anyone." Summer said as she threw what little possessions she had into a duffel bag.

She looked around the apartment. What would Todd do when he came home and found that she was not there? Was it worth the risk? It had to be… Summer had to believe in something more. There was always something more…

With that as her final thought she picked up her duffel bag, and her son and headed out of the door, never looking back.

She stood on the street corner and waited for the bus to come. People looked at her strangely as she boarded. She took a seat in the back of the bus, and handed Little Seth a toy to play with as she got her bearings together.

"The Mermaid Inn." She said to herself. It was right outside of Newport. She remembered in high school all of the students went there to sleep with each other. Summer had been there a time or two, but never to sleep with anybody. Seth had been her first, and he was way too classy for that.

"How long will you be staying miss?" The man at the counter asked her

"Um, how long can I get with 40?" She asked.

"Half a night." He responded spitting his chewing tobacco in a can. Summer looked in disgust. As she turned away from the man she noticed a hiring sign in the window.

"Can I apply for a job here?" Summer asked never thinking that she would have to resort to this.

"Look, I don't wan' any trouble. Ya look like a girl with sumtim' your runnin' from." The man commented

"I'm not running from anything." Summer said. Really Todd was much of anything. "I just need a place for my kid and I to stay for a while while I'm getting on my feet." Summer said

The man looked her up and down.

"Work Monday through Friday 6am- 2, you get a room and 50 dollars at the end of every week. You're work will pay for the room, and the 50 is what you get extra. Comprendo?" The man said

"Yeah." Summer said nodding her head.

"Good. You're room number 23, meet me here tomorrow morning at 5:45 am. If you're late consider yourself fired and homeless." Summer nodded, picking up Little Seth, and leaving the check in booth."

~_11 year old Summer and Marissa sat on the edge of the Coopers pool._

"What do you want to be when you grow up?" Marissa asked her friend as they splashed their toes lightly in the water.

"A super model." Summer said confidently. "And I want a rich husband."

"Do you want kids?" Marissa asked squinting to see her friend in the sun. It was summer so both girls hair was considerably light, and they were acquiring a nice tan.

"No." 

"Why not? My dad says babies are blessings."

"Cause you gotta push 'em out of you, and then you gotta feed them and play with them and pay for them. It's not worth it." She said seriously. But it sounded like someone elses words and not her own.

"Look." Marissa said pointing to the fence that separated her yard from the Cohens. Sandy, Kirsten and that weird Seth kid were around a table by the pool. They had a cake in front of them. "I guess it's Seth's birthday." Marissa said

"Why doesn't he have any friends over?"

"I don't think he's got any." Marissa said pondering who she had ever seen Seth with besides that weird kid Alan who always ate his boogers.

Summers felt a twinge of guilt. She was never friends with the kid. But he was strange! And ugly! And played with bugs, and got good grades! But still… he was the only one who watched the squirrels like she did…

Marissa went and got in the shower when they were done in the pool. Summer went into her back pack and grabbed a piece of pale yellow paper, and some of Marissas new gel pens she would kill her if she knew she was using.

"Hi Cohen,

We have never really talked or anything like that. I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday because I want to be nice. I thought your science project of the stages of mold growth was pretty cool. Happy 12th birthday!"

Summer did not dare to sign her name. She wrote SETH on her best cursive on the front and sat it on his porch before returning to Marissas house unnoticed. 


	4. So be good to try

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Chapter 3: "So be good to try"

Summer pushed open the door to the hotel. It was decent enough compared to she and Todds apartment. Against any of her old standards it was unlivable. 

"We're going to be staying here for awhile." She told little Seth.

Summer sat her son on the bed, and watched as he just sat picking lint off of the sheets on the bed. 

Sometimes death seemed easier than life. When you are dead you don't have to worry about being hurt, or hurting other people, you don't have to worry about existing! Sometimes she thought that her mother had the right idea.

_13 year old Summer Roberts sat on her bed painting her toe nails a metallic pick when there was a knock outside of her door._

"Come in" Summer said not looking up from her task. She noticed that Marissa stood in her doorway visibly shaken up.

She didn't move as Marissa sat next to her.

"Coop. What's wrong?"

"Alan killed himself."

The words numbed Summers insides.

"Cohen's friend? The one that picked his nose until it bled?" Summer asked

Marissa nodded holding back tears. She had not known Alan but was one of the most empathetic anyone knew, so therefore was having a hard time keeping herself together.

"How do you know?"

"Kirsten Cohen was outside of her house, she was talking to my dad, … I over heard her telling him that Alan hung himself yesterday."

Summer couldn't believe it. But then her thoughts drifted to that Cohen kid. How was he doing? She knew how much it hurt to loose someone you love.

"And Cohen?" She asked

"I don't know. I saw him sitting on the edge of the pool holding a plastic horse. He was there for hours but didn't move." Marissa said.

The Funeral for Alan had been a somber one. All of the kids that had teased Alan, and made his life a living hell were there crying over him. It made Summer sick to her stomach although she was one of them. They didn't give a damn about Alan!

She had not been to a funeral since her mothers. Suddenly it all became too much to handle. She found herself excusing herself to go to the bathroom about half way through.

She tip toed down the hall looking for the bathroom. She then saw the Seth kid. He was sitting, back against the wall in a black suit, head in his hands. He looked up when he heard footsteps coming toward him.

Summer saw the boy, his eyes red from crying.

"I'm sorry." Was all that she could manage to say.

Seth didn't respond his eyes were pointed at her but it seemed that thye were looking through her, and Summer did not like it.

She sat down next to Seth. She hesitated before she spoke.

"My mother killed herself." Summer said. Now Seth met her eyes. She had only ever told Marissa about this. Her funeral had been a hush-hush thing. Daddy hadn't wanted to ruin the good family name by getting a suicide point against them. But this was Cohen, who did he have to tell?

"I'm sorry." He said

"I know it sucks, but it gets easier." Summer said.

"How?" Seth asked her

"You forget." Summer said

"You can't forget someone you care about." His voice cracking, maybe because he was crying, or maybe because his voice was changing.

Summer took in his words. Maybe he was right. NO! He wasn't right. Of course you could forget about someone that you care about? Why couldn't she remember mommys face? Or her voice! Seth Cohen was wrong.

"I'm sorry." She said standing up and leaving the sad confused boy alone on the floor of the church hall way.

She quickly found the bathroom now. She looked at herself in the mirror… well there was one thing that she still remembered about her mother. Her mothers eyes, she saw them every time she looked in the mirror.

"Wan' lunch?" Little Seth said looking up at her tilting his head to the side as he spoke.

"Yeah baby." She said picking him up.

She sat him down at the little table under the window of the motel, as she searched her bag for food. She had a lot of packs of saltine crackers and jelly that she had gotten from this diner that they had stopped. She spread the jelly thinly over the crackers for her son. She then went to the kitchen and filled his sippy-cup with water from the faucet. 

She sat the meal on the napkin in front of him. He looked up at her.

"I know baby. But just try it. It's not bad." She said biting into a cracker. "See, yummy!"

He just stared at her.

"You don't want to eat! Fine!" Summer said storming away from the table leaving a shocked Little Seth. He had never heard his mother yell at anyone besides his father, especially not at him. Summer sank down into the bed sobbing. Her loose pony tail, had hair falling from random places. Her torn pair of jeans she had since forever hung off of her.

Little Seth climbed from the chair, and over to the bed.

"Mama." He said tugging on her shirt. She noticed that he held a jellied cracker in one hand when she turned over. She looked at him, his eyes were like a mirror. He held the cracker to her lips, but she did not eat it. Then he took a bite of it himself.

"See, yummy." He said eating the rest of the cracker. He stuck his chest out proudly.

Summer had no choice but to smile at her young son. She loved him more than she ever thought possible. She was doing this for him. He could not grow up around Todd. He didn't deserve to see his mother abused. It was for him.


	5. But you don't know how to come back down

Hey! I really like this chapter. There is a lot of cool stuff in the flash backs, what she said she never wanted she ends up having… you'll pick it up. Read, Review, and REQUEST! Oh, btw, I am not signing with my pen-name anymore. My real name is Julian, yes I have a guys name and I am a girl. I like it though. Anyway, my friends call me Jules, or Julesy. So now you will see it signed with one of those! HEHE

XOXO Jules

Chapter 5: "But you just don't know how to come back down"

Summer woke up the next morning at 4:45 in the morning. She had to start her early cleaning shift. Little Seth was still asleep.

"Hum…" Summer said trying to figure out what to do with Seth while she went about the cleaning duties.

She noticed that the bottom section of her cleaning cart was cleared off. She quickly tossed some loose bedding from her bed onto it… It was alright for little Seth for awhile. She laid the sleeping little boy into what would be his new bed for the morning.

She changed into her maids uniform and then looked at herself in the mirror… Summer saw in her reflection everything that of herself she didn't want to see. A blue collar worker, a battered woman, a girl practically on the streets, … a mother…

_14 year old Marissa and Summer paced around Summers room trying to find the perfect outfit to wear for the first day of high school._

Summers house was empty but it was okay. Some days she didn't mind it so much. 

At least she wasn't on the streets

"What about this?" Marissa asked holding a shirt of Summers in front of herself.

Summer looked at Marissas deteriorating frame…

"It won't fit you." Summer said bluntly

"Do you think I am too fat?" Marissa asked becoming self-conscious.

"No! I meant that I think that you are too thin!"

"Really because you don't have to lie if you thi-"

"Marissa!" Summer said to her best friend. "You're being ridiculous!"

Summer never needed a child, Marissa was her child. 

She was the only one that she had enough love to give to. She and Marissa, that is how it would always be.

"You have lost a lot of weight recently." Summer said

Marissa didn't respond she just kept on going through the closet. Summer never worried about material things. Whatever she wanted she got.

She would never be a blue collar worker

"Marissa listen to me!" Summer said standing up.

"Oh what? So I can hear more of your insults?" She said spinning around to face her best friend.

"I am not trying to insult you. I am trying to help you!" Summer pleaded with her.

"Well I don't need your help!" Marissa said storming out of the room.

Summer watched the door that her best friend had just disappeared behind… Had they really just had a fight? She and Marissa didn't fight? Only mom's and dad's fight. Or boyfriends and girlfriends. But not she and Marissa… They were better than that.

Marissa was the only thing that Summer had, and she didn't want to loose her… She had lost too much already. That was how so decided to go and talk to her. 

She was to strong to get beaten..

Summer walked along the streets to Marissas house, she was almost there when… WOOSH! Summer felt herself being knocked to the ground. She looked up to find that Cohen kid and his skateboard in hand…

"I am so sorry!" He said leaning down and giving her a hand to help her up. "Marissa is not home." He added as Summer brushed off her skirt, annoyed that she kept on have runs ins with the Cohen kid, literally a "run in" this time.

"How do you know that?" She asked fixing her hair and looking the young boy in the eye. His voice was on the brink of changing.

"I saw her and her mom leave not too long ago." Seth said

"Where were they going?" Summer asked

"Shopping." Seth responded. "For new school clothes for Marissa. I can see why though."

"What do you mean?" Summer asked shifting her hair out of her eyes

"Well Marissa is a bean pole." Seth responded bluntly.

"You have noticed too haven't you?" Seth nodded. "What do you think I can do?" Summer asked shifting her weight to her other foot.

"Don't do nothing." Was all that Seth could say… "… If something were to even happen to her, and you could have done something to stop it, you will never forgive yourself." Seth said. "I know that first hand." He was probably thinking of Alan right then.

"Thanks Cohen." Summer said 

Because of Seth's words, his warnings, Summer was able to push her best friend to get the help that she needed. Although to her mother she just had "stress related weight loss."

Summer walked around the hotel cleaning rooms… scrubbing up the mysterious substances on the floors, … changing the sheets, … that one required gloves. She never thought that she would become so desperate. But those days of being naïve old Summer Roberts were gone. Now she had the future of a child to think about. 

Little Seth played quietly on the bottom of the cart as Summer worked. She would occasionally allow him to get up and run around the room. 

Occasionally she thought of Todd. Where was he? What was he doing? Was he going to come after her? She did have their son… though she doubted he cared too much for the child.

At two o' clock Summer was finished for the day and along with Little Seth, starving. She stopped by a little corner market that she remembered from her middle school years. She and Marissa would steal cigarettes from this particular place.

She had 50 dollars in advance for her first week. She knew that she had to spend it wisely… She bought things that would last long. Things mostly for little Seth. Luckily he was potty trained so she didn't have to worry about pampers or anything. When she did when he was younger it practically burned holes in her pockets.

Summer ended up buying a pint of milk, more crackers, goldfish crackers, a frozen pizza, oatmeal, and a coke for herself. She didn't know how she picked what she was going to buy… it was more of what she could afford, and what she could force little Seth to eat.

She walked back to the hotel, with Little Seth on her hip, his head resting on her shoulder… Why was her door opened? She entered cautiously… Only to find…

"Todd…" Summer said her voice becoming stuck in her throat…


	6. And so you beat me up, you break me down

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Chapter 6: "And now you beat me up, you break me down"

"Well bitch. I didn't think that you had the guts to run out on me." Todd said backing Summer in a corner, she gently placed little Seth on the floor. He, knowing what was coming ran into the bathroom and hid…

"Todd, you don't want me anyway. Can't you just leave me alone PLEASE!" Summer pleaded, tears coming to her eyes.

"I am afraid that I cannot do that." Todd said running his fingers warningly over Summers neck.

"Please please don't do this to me." Summer pleaded again, tears now spilling furiously down her face…

"You get what you deserve bitch." Todd said slamming her against the wall

_Summer and Marissa, age 15, sat at their desks in class. They each had just received their papers back on the American Revolution._

"I got a C!" Marissa said in disbelief. "My dad practically wrote this paper for me! What'd you get Sum?" She asked looking at her friend.

Summer tossed Marissa her paper.

"Wow." Marissa said staring down at the huge "**F**", on the paper. The was a note on the top from Mr. Manson, their teacher saying "See me after class." "Well at least you get to be with a totally hot teacher after school." Marissa said winking

It was true, Mr. Manson was one of the more decent looking teachers. He was in his early thirties. He had brown hair which he wore spiked on his head. He dressed more like a student than a teacher.

"He only chooses the students that he really likes to get after school help." Marissa said. "Or so I heard from Holly at least." He added as an after thought.

Summer knew it was true. The students that he like WERE the only ones that stayed after with him, … but the students were all girls. Summer saw how he looked at them, when they wore their halter tops and mini skirts… It was the same way that some of her dads friends looked at her when they came over for dinner parties. Summer knew better than to be flattered by his advances. And yet she knew that if she came home with an "**F**", she would be in tutoring… permanently.

"So are you going to go?" Marissa asked when class let out breaking Summer out of her thoughts.

Summer shrugged.

"I guess I don't have much choice."

"Do you want me to wait up for you?" Marissa offered

"Nah, I'll see you around." Summer said

"Alright. Bye!" Marissa said

Summer stepped back into the classroom.

"Mrs. Roberts." Mr. Mason said stepping behind her and closing the door. "Take a seat." He said pulling out a chair from a desk in the back of the room.

Summer timidly sat.

"You um, … on my paper wrote that you wanted to see me." Summer said swallowing a lump in her throat.

"Summer have you been okay lately?" He asked putting his hand on her knee, sitting across from her.

"Um yeah why?" Summer asked becoming aware of his his legs were placed on either sides of his knees…

"Well this paper wasn't like you. You seemed so detached from your work." He said

"Um well yeah, I am fine."

"Well good, at least one of us is." Mr. Mason said

This entrance to a guilt trip went unnoticed by Summer.

"What's wrong?" Summer asked, actually caring

"Oh it's nothing. I really shouldn't be talking about it with a student." He said

"You can tell me…" Summer said all to anxiously… "I mean if you want."

"It's just that my mother died…" He said.

Summers heart immediately went out to him.

"My mom is dead too." She said, chocking on her words.

"It's just really hard." Mr. Mason said "I know it must be hard for you too." Mr. Mason then pulled her into a hug… but he didn't let go.

Summer didn't realize that anything was wrong until she realized that she was practically in the older mans lap… He kept pulling her closer until their bodies were practically melded together. Summers eyes popped open as his hands began to run down her back… She felt him between her legs through her thin shirt. She shut her eyes to prevent the tears that were threatening to fall. He began to kiss her neck.

"Shh…" He said "Don't be afraid." He brushed her hair away from her face

Summer lets the tears slid down her face when she felt him shift her, and she heard him unzip his zipper. And then he lifted her skirt.

"I love you Summer." He said

After that statement he knew that she was wrapped around his finger. There was no more reason for him to pretend to be caring.

Summer later that afternoon rushed out of the classroom. He had made her re-apply her make up before she left so nobody could tell that she had been crying.

She walked awkwardly in the hall with her head down, so it was only expected that she would collide with somebody, and with her luck it was Seth Cohen.

"I'm sorry." He said bending down to pick up her books. He looked her in the eye.

"Are you okay?" He asked

Summer just nodded.

"Thanks, I um, I have to go." Summer said running off of the campus.

Three days later in school.

"Where are you going?" Summer asked, watching Marissa head to a familiar classroom.

"Mr. Mason wanted to talk with me after class." Marissa informed her.

"I'll go with you!" Summer said qickly

Marissa gave her a strange look.

"Okay whatever." Marissa said

They entered the room. Mr. Mason was surprised to see Summer there along with Marissa.

"Hello ladies." He said flashing a smile

"Better watch how you talk. People are starting to think that stuff is going on with you and students." Summer said.

"Who?" He asked alarmed

"Just people." Summer lied. "We're supposed to tell if there is anything "inappropriate" going on." Summer said "and you know how people talk." She shot him a look

He got the point. If he ever touched her best friend, he would die… well not literally but he would spend some quality time with the other pedophiles in the slammer.

Summer woke up hours later next to Todd on the bed. Why were the thoughts of Mr. Mason running through her mind? She quickly realized why when she looked down at her naked frame. She quickly dressed. She went to the kitchen area to find Little Seth on the floor helplessly munching on raw oatmeal and cookies.

She swore no more of this, and she meant it. Todd never expected her to run again, but she was strong. She packed up her bag and ran out into the night. It was then that in her pocket she found the card from the woman. "The Los Angeles Womans shelter", it read. That was where Summer needed to go.

Summer timidly walked through the doors, holding a tired little Seth in her arms, awkwardly with her backpack. She was sat in an office by a woman.

"Someone will be with you shortly." The woman informed her.

Summer waited, shifting little Seth in her arms. She suddenly heard the door open and then close. She spun around on reflex.

"Summer?" The tall dirty blonde woman said.

"Coop?" Was all that Summer could say


	7. Hoping I don't come around

**Hey all! Longer chapter, shorter flashback. Little Seth becomes more of a character in this part too! So READ, REVIEW, AND ENJOY!**

XOXO Jules

Chapter 7: "Hoping I don't come around"

"Oh my god Sum!" Marissa said flying across the room embracing her best friend, she backed away when Summer flinched. It had been so long since she was touched by anyone besides Todd, and little Seth.

Marissa surveyed her best friend. All of the bruises on her face, on her arms and legs. Summer said nothing as her best friend looked her up and down. She could not even look her in the eye… What had happened to Summer Roberts?

_16 year old Marissa and Summer sat on Marissas bed giving one another manicures._

"So, he and Anna were TOTALLY trying to throw the whole "just friends" thing in my face." Summer rattled off.

"Well then tell him!" Marissa said

"Tell him what?" Summer asked as though she didn't know

"Oh come on! It is so obvious that you have a crush on him!" Marissa said shoving her best friend off of the bed.

"Well he wants to be with Anna, and so if he wants skank I'll let him have her." Summer said pretending not to care… That was something that she was always good at.

"Summer. How come you didn't tell me? I could have helped you!" Summer said nothing… it was then that Marissa noticed the child that lay asleep in her arms. "'S he yours?" Marissa asked

Summer just nodded, but then for the first time spoke.

"His name is Seth." Summer said tears coming to her eyes…

"Is he Set-" Marissa began to ask when Summer quickly shook her head no.

"I wish." Summer admitted, "He's Todds."

"And Todd is the one who…" Marissa said looking over her friends bruises again

"Yeah." Summer confessed

Marissa wasn't sure what to say. She never expected to be the one that would have to keep Summer grounded. Summer was the strong one… Summer always was…

"So do you like work here or something?" Summer asked her

"Um yeah. I've been working here for about six months. I like it a lot." Marissa said

Summer nodded.

"Wanna come back to my place with me. I am off. You were supposed to be my last person for the night. Usually we have rooms here for you and stuff, … but I would really like it if you came back to my apartment with me."

Summer thought for a second. Where else did she really have to go? This was it for her. Marissa was what she had…

"Sure." Summer said

The ride back to Marissas apartment was a silent one. Little Seth was asleep in the back seat. Marissa showed Summer around her two bedroom apartment.

"You guys can stay in here." Marissa said leading Summer, who was holding Seth into the guest room.

"Thanks." Summer said lying Little Seth down on the bed.

"Wanna come out into the living room and talk for a bit before bed?" Marissa asked

Summer shrugged

"Why not." She said

The two sat down on the couches in an awkward silence for a couple of seconds.

"So how old is Little Seth?" Marissa asked

"He's is about three and a half." Summer said. "So what have you been up to the past four years?" She quickly asked trying to avoid the questions that she knew were coming her way… But four years since they saw each other? She and Marissa before college were ever apart for more then four days.

"Ah. Same old Same old." Marissa said. "I graduated from College two years ago and that's about it. I just stared working in the shelter. Nothing interesting really."

"What about Ryan?" Summer asked, surprised that they were not currently attached at the hip.

"We, we haven't talked in awhile." She looked down at her hands. "When we did the year in Spain, I guess it was like, I donno, Junior year of college, anyway, we both realized that… I guess we realized that we both wanted different things." She tried to rationalize, seeming unsure of the situation herself.

Summers head was screaming to ask about Seth… but something stopped her.

"Now you." Marissa said "What have you been up to the past four years." Her voiced stayed calm and even.

"Not much."

"Oh Sum, don't even try to feed me that. I know it's been awhile but you are still my best friend."

Summer looked over at the shelf above Marissas fireplace. A picture sat there of She, Marissa, Ryan, and Seth right after graduation.

"I met Todd my first year at Berkley. He was a Sophomore there at the time…" She stumbled over her words. "We started dating… about six months later I was pregnant with Little Seth." Summer explained like it was nothing, but her eyes told a different story.

"And so he was the one that hit you?"

Summer nodded

"At first I thought it was cute how he didn't like other guys looking at me and stuff… But then it got kind of scary. He didn't want me to go out anywhere… He didn't want me to do anything with anyone…"

"Why didn't you leave?"

"It's not that easy!" Summer said rather defensively. "Todd was all that I had, … and then when I found out that I was having Little Seth he was so happy… I thought that the baby would change him."

"Did it?" Marissa asked

"For awhile." Summer tucked her hair behind her ears. "But then Little Seth was born and he cried a lot, … and then Todd snapped off the handle again."

"So this has been going on for the past three years?"

Summer shrugged.

"I guess." She said trying to change the subject.

Marissa nodded and looked at her feet. She should have been there for her, she should have kept in touch, or this wouldn't have happened. Summer would have known that she had someone to go to.

"I'm going to head in." Summer said heading back to the room. "Goodnight." Summer said mentally slapping herself for not asking Marissa where Seth Cohen was these days. Oh well, she'd find out soon enough.

"Night." Marissa said sitting on the couch awhile longer before retiring into her room.

The next morning Marissa awoke at 5:30 in the morning, as usual because she ran before work. She called in sick to so that she could spend time with Summer.

"Maybe I should make breakfast." Marissa said when she heard small footsteps coming from thew kitchen. She stepped cautiously around the corner to find Little Seth on the counter eating peanut butter…

She didn't make her presence known, she just watched as the Little Boy sat, expressionless, feet dangling over the edge of the counter… He seemed to be thinking. But what did a three year old have to think about? Maybe this three year old had too much… Little Seth took care of himself when he had to, and it showed.

"Hi." Marissa said coming into the kitchen. Little Seth didn't respond. He just looked at her. "I'm Marissa, your mommys friend."

The little boy looked over at her.

"Maybe we shouldn't eat peanut butter for breakfast."

Little Seth looked down at the jar, and then back up at Marissa.

"What do you say about pancakes and eggs."

Little Seth thought for a second. His big brown eyes then met Marissas…

"Eggs ar' 'pensive…" He said.

Marissa was surprised. What would a three and a half year old know about prices?

"I think it will be fine. And we can get some pancakes too!" Marissa said smiling and helping the little boy off of the counter. "We can run out to the store and get some, I will go tell your mom." Marissa said walking out… Little Seth went and put the peanut butter back in the pantry…

"SUM!" Marissa whispered gently shaking her best friend who was sleeping like a rock. "Is it cool if I take Seth out to the store real quick? We'll be back in twenty minutes."

"Yeah." Summer said turning back over. She slept like she never had before, because for the first time she felt safe…

Marissa re-entered the room to see Little Seth counting his fingers over and over again. Marissa raised her eyebrow. Now was not the time to question the boys strange behavior.

"Ready to go?" Marissa asked holding out her arms to pick him up.

Seth nodded and allowed the older woman to pick him up. The little boy had a bony frame and was quite easy for Marissa to carry. Go figure. She opened up the door and then headed out to the hallway where she saw her neighbor getting him mail… He neighbor Seth Cohen…


	8. Kick me when I'm on the ground

**Hey! READ, REVIEW, AND REQUEST!!!!!!!**

XOXO Jules

Chapter 8: "Kick me when I'm on the ground"

Marissa's mind was racing when she saw Seth in the hallway. What was she supposed to tell him about the little boy that was in her company?

"Who is this?" Seth said bending down to the little boys eye level, rubbing his curly brown hair

"I'm Seth." The little boy said.

"Me too." Seth said smiling. "Dude this kid has the same name as me!" He said looking up dumbly at Marissa, who in turn rolled her eyes. "Who's kid is he?"

"Summers." Marissa said drearily.

"WHAT!" Seth said standing up. "Where is she?" He asked looking around the hall.

"In my place." Marissa said picking up little Seth and putting him on her hip.

"I need to talk to her." Seth said. His eyes were darting around.

"I'm taking little Seth to the store to get stuff for breakfast. You can go on in. The door is open. She's asleep." Marissa said heading down the hallway unsure is she had done the right thing.

"Thanks." Seth said starting to a slow jog to Marissa's place.

He walked in the apartment, figuring that Summer would be in the bedroom. The door was only partially opened. He looked through the crack and saw the first glance of the girl who had hurt him so badly so many years ago… Her arms were sprawled about on the bed, and the bottom of her back and her bare legs were exposed… Seth saw fresh bruises forming on them. What had happened to her over all of these years? Her hair was up in a high loose ponytail that Seth had seen so many times. Her body was a lot thinner than it used to be…

"Summer." Seth said tapping on her shoulder. Summer jumped out of the bed. She met him with a punch to the jaw.

"OH MY GOD!" Summer yelled when she realized that it was not Todd who she punched. She looked around the room. "Seth where is he?" She asked running around the apartment.

"RIGHT HERE!" Seth said waving his arm in front of her face.

"Not you Cohen, my son-" Summer turned around and looked Seth Cohen, the love of her life in the face... The love of her life that she had just punched… "Seth…" She said swallowing a lump in her throat.

"Little Seth is at the store with Marissa." He said

"What are you doing here?" Summer said wrapping her arms around herself suddenly becoming aware of her appearance.

"I live here." Seth said

"YOU LIVE WITH COOP?" Summer asked feeling like the 17 year old jealous girlfriend again.

"No. I live down the hall." He explained.

"So then why are you here?" Summer asked.

"Little Seth." Seth said

"What about him?" Summer asked him.

"Is he mine?" Seth asked

"I how could he be yours! The last time that we slept together was high school!" Summer practically yelled in anger. Sure she wanted little Seths to be Seth's, but he was Todds! Him rubbing it in her face was just plain wrong!

"You don't remember?" Seth asked squinting his eyes.

She remembered his visit… but nothing that would result in a child… Summer didn't remember a lot, thanks to taking so many blows in the head from Todd, and yet she said nothing to Seth.

"I came to visit you at Berkley…" He began.

_18 year old Seth Cohen skated along the main campus of Berkley. He stopped when he saw her in the distance… She wore a short skirt, and a tank top. A guys arm was slung over her arm and would occasionally travel to fondle her in one place or another._

Seth raised his eyebrow and decided not to question it. He skated over to them…

"Summer." He said getting off of his board and putting it in it's rightful place under his arm.

"Who's this dick head?" The guy that Summer was with said staring at Seth earning a laugh from all of his friends.

"Leave him alone Todd…" Summer said chuckling uneasily

"You know this prick?" Todd said shooting a glare at Summer.

"I um… we uh…" Summer stuttered.

"Grew up with each other." Seth added.

"Yeah, this is um… Seth Cohen, my cousin…" Summer said.

"Oh." Todd said turning his back to Seth like he wasn't worth their time.

"Yeah, well… Cousin Summer…" Seth began, "Aunt… Gail had a heart attack, … she didn't make it… so I um, need to discuss… funeral arrangements with you… Like now." Seth said.

The awkwardness of the situation went unnoticed by Todd who was checking himself out in the mirror…

"Sure." Summer said. "Do you mind?" Summer asked looking up at this Todd guy.

He though for a second.

"Be back by two." He said. He then leaned her back against the tree where they were standing and practically raped her mouth with his tongue.

Seth looked away. Summer wiped her mouth and hurried off with Seth.

"What the hell was that?" Seth asked when they reached his car.

Summer couldn't look him in the eyes. She just stared at her manicured nails.

"ANSWER ME DAMNIT SUMMER!" Seth now yelled.

Summer flinched. She had never heard Seth raise his voice like that before.

"My boyfriend." She said in a quiet voice.

"How the hell did you hook up with that prick?" Seth asked

"He's nice. I swear it." Summer insisted.

"If he is so nice then why do you look so miserable?" Seth asked rubbing small circle on her back as he drove. They parked in an empty parking lot.

"I… I'm… because Seth I ruined the one good thing that I had going for me." She said

"What was that?" He asked leaning in towards her.

"You…" Summer said letting him kiss her…

Seth gently laid Summer down against the seat and scooted partially on top of her. Her hands traveled up his arms…

Summer woke up hours later. Seth was asleep, his arms wrapped around her body. What had she done? She didn't deserve Cohen! That was why she broke up with him! That is why she lied and told him that she didn't love him…

Summer wandered back to campus feeling guilty for leaving Seth but she had no other choice. She would hurt him. She hurt anyone that she got close to. She entered her room to find Todd waiting for her.

"Where have you been BITCH?" He yelled. "You fucked him didn't you? Your cousin! Dirty slut. What did you do to him? What are you like an inbred cunt or something? What the hell Am I supposed to do with you now? You belong to ME! Do your best to remember that!" He said pushing her on the bed… He wasn't gentle like Seth. His hands were rough and uncaring and cold over her body… Why had she left him? … No, She didn't deserve Seth, this is what she deserved…

…and then the memory faded…

Back to reality…

"You don't remember?" Seth said

"No." Summer said bursting into tears.

**I know that the break up was not exactly explained but it will be soon!**


	9. Well how about those people I know, do y...

Alright, fair warning, the end of this chapter is slightly confusing, but it is meant to be. It will all be explained next chapter.

xoxo Jules

Chapter 9: "Well how about those people I know that you know the ones I mean"

"WHAT!" Seth practically yelled. "You have no recollection what so ever of what happened in the Rover that night?"

"I JUST SAID NO!" Summer yelled

"How the hell do you not remember?"

"I just don't alright Seth!"

"Is Little Seth my kid or not? I just don't understand how the hell you don't know!"

Summer took a deep breath. She had promised herself that she was never going to be in this situation.

She had never seen this side of Cohen before...

_ Seventeen year old Summer Roberts walked into an empty house. She just got back from a date with Seth. Inside the mansion it was always cold, dark, and gloomy. Summer climbed the stair with ease, but stopped suddenly when she noticed that her mothers bedroom door was ajar. The maids could have been stealing again…_

Summer hadn't been in her mothers room since the night before she died… it had been a long twelve years. Summer timidly stepped into the room. As she looked around memories flooded her mind like an unstoppable tidal wave.

When she was younger Summer would dance around the room with her mother in an unruly manner singing Etta James… her mother had let her wear her pearl earrings. Sometimes when her mother was out she would sneak into her rooms and try on her high heels and prance around like the ideal Newport woman chattering about the latest charity event that would be the scene of some mans downfall.

What she remembered the most was the vanity, the windows now caked with dust. Her mother would sit in front of that vanity, combing each piece of hair over and over. Sometimes before Summer went to bed her mother would allow her to sit on the padded vanity seat and she would braid her hair until two perfect pig tails.

When you were a child you ignored all of your mothers imperfections. Now looking back Summer saw all of the warning signs… everything that would have told an adult that she was unhappy. Summer remembered her taking medicine all of the time… all of the time. And she would wash it down with a clear liquid that looked like water but wasn't because water didn't burn your throat like it did when Summer tried it.

"Mommy…" Summer said as traced her fingers lightly over the pillow, still doused with her mothers scent. Something in her then gave way. She shoved her face into the bedspread and sobbed heavily, the bathroom where her mother was found dead less than a few feet away…

"SUMMER!" Seth yelled pulling the girl back into reality.

"Look Seth, I cannot do this right now. I think that you should leave." Summer said more of and order than request.

"What?" Seth asked raising his eyebrows.

"GO!" Summer yelled pointing towards the door. "I can't deal with this right now Cohen!"

Cohen… the name twisted Seths heart, he was still her Cohen.

"I'll be back." He said heading out slamming the door behind him.

He stood in the hall for about five minutes and the Marissa appeared down the hall, Little Seth holding her hand.

"Seth?" Marissa said, and then she saw the look on his face. "Oh god, what is it? Where is Summer?"

"In your apartment." He grabbed Marissa's arm. "My place, now!" He ordered.

Little Seth watched the two adults. The scene in front of him was nothing out of the normal. Seth closed the door when they got in. His face looked angry. He and Marissa both started to say something, but then Little Seth ran into the bathroom and closed the door.

"What was that about?" Seth asked Marissa

"He probably thought that we were about to fight."

"Why would a three year old think that?" 

Marissa looked at the ground and shrugged.

"Alright look, does Summer have amnesia or something, because she SEEMS to not remember sleeping with me." Seth said

"What?" Marissa asked shock

For years Seth and Marissa had avoided any Summer or Ryan talk with one another. And it suddenly became so apparent why.

"Yeah, back freshman year when I went to visit her. Who the hell does she think Seth's father is?" Seth yelled

"Todd!"

"Todd! Todd from Berkley?" Seth remembered the guy well after only meeting him for five minutes.

"Sometimes trauma survivors block out-"

"Wait what, trauma survivor? Don't spit that therapist stuff out at me. What happened to her?" Seth demanded

Marissa looked at her feet.

"Marissa, you gotta tell me something here!" Seth pleaded.

"Summer has gone out with Todd since freshman year, he beats her, rapes her, all that stuff." Marissa said, her voice muffled by sobs that were almost daring to escape.

"What! Why didn't she tell me?" Seth said hysterically. "GOD!" He yelled

"She… she just thinks that she deserves it." Marissa explained

"Why the hell would she be think that she deserves it! That's crazy!"

"Um excuse you Seth but it's not crazy at all. You have always held Summer up on such a high pedestal there is nowhere else to go but down. She disappoints you and she feels that she is the most horrible person in the world! THAT is why she broke up with you! She was tired of hurting you. She didn't want to do it anymore. She didn't want to hurt anyone else!"

"Well as I recall someone ended up hurt, and someone else dead!"

"Summer thought she was doing the right thing! You don't know what it's like to be in her positon!"

"Oh, and I assume you do?" Seth challenged

"Not exactly but I know more than you! I saw Summer run all of the decisions through her head time and time again. She cried in my arms late into the night about how much it all was hurting you. She didn't cry for herself Seth, she cried for YOU!" Marissa yelled

"So what, she made the decision that she did to protect me?" Seth said sarcastically

"It wasn't ONLY for you, her choice. Summer always said that she would have never lived if she had to go through the pain that she did… in her mind she helped the situation, made it better for everyone."

"But I told her… I would have been there… I wanted to be there for her…" Seth yelled…

He remembered the day so clearly...

**And you're thinkin' huh? hehe, that was my point. Anyways all will be explained in the next chapter which will be completely in flashback.**

xoxo Jules


	10. Not so good

**Hey! I just wanted to remind you that this is all in flashbacks if the italics do not do so. READ AND REVIEW! Ryan in next chap!**

** xoxo Jules**

Chapter 10: "Not so good"

_ Summer, age 17 sat on her bed. Seth Cohen, her now boyfriend was kissing her neck._

"Seth." She said as he kissed her. "Seth." She said again

"Summer." He moaned into her neck.

"Seth, stop it!" Summer said pushing him off of her.

Seth hit the floor with a loud THUMP. He looked up to see Summer fixing her shirt.

"Ow!" He complained. "What was that for?" He rubbed his head

"Nothing. I'm just not in the mood." Summer said straightening out her hair. "Anyway I've gotta be at Coops in five. Shove out kid."

"I'm your boyfriend and all I get is a shove out?" Seth said leaning up to kiss her. But Summer turned away.

"I've gotta jet Cohen." She said walking out of her house Seth following closely behind.

"Summer, but Sum-" Before he could finish she had sped off in her car leaving a very confused Cohen on her door step.

Summer let herself into Marissa and Jimmys apartment. Jimmy wasn't home. He was out at a job interview or something like that.

"Hey Sum." Marissa said as her best friend entered her room.

Summer dove onto Marissa's bed head first.

"How was your date with Seth?"

Summer shrugged face still down.

"Did you tell him?" She asked running her fingers through Summers dark hair

"I tried to, but he just kept kissing me and trying to do stuff." Summer said groaning

"So what happened?" Marissa asked

"Nothing. I wouldn't. As far as I am concerned that stuff is what got me in this situation anyway." Summer said turning over onto her back.

"Well now he's probably wondering why you blew him off." Marissa said

"Well then let him wonder Coop. I'm not going to tell him. It's really none of his business." She said coldly

"Like hell it isn't his business it's his chi-"

"Don't you even Marissa! Don't even call it that. I have an appointment to get this taken care of and then Seth will never know. I can't do this. I mean if I … had… it… I'd screw it up. I've screwed everything up so much already, but to wake up everyday and see someone that is completely messed up and know that it is my fault? To have to put that burden on Seth? I can't do it Coop."

"What is it with you and assuming that you screw up everything? Other people need to be responsible for their actions! Not just you. Seth will be there for you and your child. It will be alright Summer!"

Mr. Mason ran his hand up her leg…

"Really Coop? How would it be for a child growing up as the Newport Beach bastard? Having a mother like me. I don't know what to do with a child. It's better off not having to know this life. Any life at all. And Seth, he would never amount to anything being tied down by me. I just can't be the person to take it all away Coop." Summer said, her voice emotionless.

"You don't have to abort it you could always just give it up when it's born." Marissa tried to persuade her

"Right, and risk Seth and the rest of Newport finding out? Risk the child finding me one day and seeing how much of a loser I am. I can't have that. And besides, I don't want kids, I want nothing to do with them at all. EVER." Summer said as a final thought.

Why is the water red? Is mommy breathing?

"Sum, you know me, we have been best friends forever, since that day on the swing in kindergarten, I love you, I just want to make sure that you are making the right decision."

"I know Coop. Trust me, I thought about this over and over again. I'm not fine with the decision but I have to become fine with it because it I don't go through with it… I just think it would be worse in the long run." Summer said more seriously.

"I'll go with you to your appointment." Marissa said

"No, I'll be alright." Summer said.

"I'm going!" Marissa said definitely

"I have it scheduled for the day after graduation." Summer said.

"Are you SURE you don't want to tell Seth?" Marissa asked

"He can't know." Summer said.

Marissa nodded. There was no way that she was going to change Summers mind and right now she really needed to be on the good side. Marissa herself could never imagine doing what Summer was doing, but still she didn't know which took more strength, going through with it or not…

Summer looked from where she sat on stage at her graduation. Her father could not be there. He was on a business trip on the east coast which he said was non-negotiable, even though Summer reminded him of the upcoming date for the past couple of months. It must take a lot to talent to forget the way that he does.

"Summer Roberts." The Principal called.

Summer stood up and surveyed the crowd. A bunch of Newport socialites was all they were. None meant anything to her, other that the Coopers, with the exception of Julie, and the Cohens.

_ Seth, who was sitting next to Marissa cheered loudly causing Summer to blush. She loved him so much and what she was going to do was going to hurt him, but at least he would never find out._

_ That night Marissa and Summer skipped all of the wild parties and went back to Summers place. Marissa was trying to lay off the booze and Summer wasn't up for the Newport party scene with tomorrows pending events._

_ Summer and Marissa laid on her bed looking up at the ceiling._

_"I really need a drink right now." Summer said_

_"You shouldn't be drinking now." Marissa said looking over at her. "You'd be hurting my 'would be' god child."_

_"Key word, would be." Summer said "You're not making this easy Coop."_

_"I'm not because I love you. Besides, what if you run out or something?" Marissa said_

_"Oh please, that is so lifetime movie." She rolled her eyes_

_"My mom did." Marissa said pointedly._

_"Julie Cooper? With a heart? When was this?" Summer asked_

_"When she was pregnant with me. It was before they were married and my mom didn't want me, but something happened and my dad showed up and then there was chaos, and then my mom ran out, and then there was a elopement, and then there was me." Marissa said_

_"What drugs were they on when they told you this story?"_

_"They were fighting one day and I over heard it." She explained._

_"I know that was like supposed to guilt trip me out of it but my mind is made up." Summer said_

_ Marissa quickly glanced at her best friend before she turned over._

_"Goodnight." was all that she said, and the Marissa and Summer were quiet. Neither was asleep, but neither in the right mind for that matter._

_ The next morning Summer and Marissa went to the Newport Health Clinic, which oddly enough sat on the pier. Probably to draw in all of the teens with STD's and stuff of that nature. Or for the Newport women who know that their husbands won't be around there and wanted to see what they contracted from their pool boy._

_"Ready?" Marissa asked suddenly_

_ Summer nodded. Marissa glanced back and forth from her watch to the clock as she was waiting for Summer to get finished with the procedure. The Office suddenly seemed as though it was suffocating her. She could not believe that her best friend was back there getting… you know… She got out of her seat and walked outside to get air only to see Ryan and Seth in the distance. She tried to turn away but they spotted her._

_"Marissa?" Ryan said coming over with Seth_

_"Um, Ryan, hi!" She said kissing him on the cheek._

_"What are you doing here?" He asked._

_"Oh me, I… I um… I'm just here with a friend." She said smiling._

_"Are you lying to me?" Ryan asked raising an eyebrow_

_"Man, you knock her up?" Seth asked looking at Ryan with a grin._

_ Marissa shot him a glare, her only fully understanding the irony of the situation._

_"Shutting up now." Seth said putting his hands up_

_"No, I was telling the truth. I am here with a friend." She said again, "I have to go-" She began but as she did Summer came out looking miserable._

_ Everyone was caught in an awkward moment._

_"Summer?" Seth said_

_"Um, hey Cohen." She said crossing her arms over herself._

_"Are you alright? Why were you in there?"_

_"No reason." She lied, "Just a check up."_

_"Since when do you go to the clinic for a 'check up'?" Seth asked. Right then a nurse rushed out with a bag._

_"Honey you left your things." She said handing Summer her bag. "Inside we slipped some brochures about post abortion bleeding and so on." The woman said smiling and going back inside_

_"YOU DID WHAT!" Seth yelled. "What the hell Summer!"_

_"You don't understand Cohen." Summer challenged. "Just leave me the hell alone!"_

_"What do you mean leave you alone! YOU just killed MY baby!" Seth yelled becoming hysterical. He was holding onto Summers shoulders._

_"YOURS!" She said pushing his hands off of herself. "YOU don't have morning sickness, YOU don't have to carry it for nine months, YOU won't get blamed when it turns out screwed up like it's mother!" Summer yelled tears coming to her eyes._

_' screwed up like it's mother ', Seth took in those words._

_"You're not screwed up Summer. But this, this hurt me more than anything ever could have. We were going to have a baby Summer…" He said_

_"You weren't supposed to find out…" She whispered_

_"Well I did… God Summer, why?" He asked a tear coming to his eye._

_"Because." Summer said pulling together all the strength she had to say the biggest most life changing lie of her life, "I don't love you."_

**Hey all. Read and review and let me know what you think. I have the perfect ending for this story. I'm not sure others will like it but hey... There are around three chapters left. The song is almost over! BTW: If I did not make a note before each title of a chapter is a lyric of the song "Mediocre Bad Guys", but Jack Johnson. Download it and check it out. It is on his CD "On and On". THANKS!**

** XOXO jules**


	11. Not so bad

**Sorry about the delay of this chapter. I had some problems with my computer. I got all of my other stories up last week but this on, But you have a new chapter now! I love u all! READ, REVIEW, AND REQUEST! RYAN IS IN THE CHAPTER!**

** XOXO Jules**

Chapter 11: "Not so bad"

The day still gave Seth the shivers. He was going to be the father of Summers child but she killed it, but she kept the child that she thought that she had with this Todd character? That made no sense.

"Seth, Summer has been through a really hard time and the last thing that she needs is to have the added stress of you." Marissa said taking a deep breath. "Seth, if you care about her at all you will just leave it be for the time being."

"She obviously doesn't care about me."

Right then they both turned to hear the door swing open. They turned around expecting to see Summer… but indeed it was not Summer at the door.

"Hey…" Ryan said looking at Marissa and Seth back and forth. He held bags on his shoulders. "Did I interrupt…" He asked glancing back towards the door

Neither Seth nor Marissa responded.

"What are you doing here?" Seth asked

"This was the week I was visiting…" Ryan said… "Remember, you've been trying to talk me into coming back out here…" Ryans voice faded off as he gazed at Marissa. Beautiful as usual… frazzled looking also as usual.

"Oh yeah man. Here let me help you." Seth said grabbing Ryans bags.

"Hi." Marissa said hugging Ryan who she had not seen in almost two years. He looked the same… exactly the same…

"Hi. What are you doing here?" He asked

"I live down the hall." Marissa explained.

"That's nice." Ryan said, the situation becoming awkward.

Seth went back to the guest bedroom to put Ryans bags down. He found Seth sitting there on the bed humming a song.

"Hey little man." Seth said putting down his bags.

His feet were out in front of him. From what he could tell the soles were practically worn to his feet, and the material on the top was ripped. They probably were too small too.

"Hi." Little Seth said looking up at the larger version of himself.

"You can come out of the room now if you want." Seth offered.

Little Seth thought for a moment, and then grabbed Seth's hand and allowed Seth to lead him out.

Ryan did a double take when he saw Seth enter the room with Little Seth.

"Um… Seth, is there something that you want to tell us?" Ryan asked

"I'm not sure." Seth said

"Who's is he?" Ryan asked now more confused then before

"Summers." Marissa said, "Who by the way I should be getting back to." She picked up little Seth. "I'll come by later." Marissa said leaving.

Ryan and Seth exchanged glances. Seth explained the whole story to Ryan

"So you really think that the kid is yours?"

"Yeah, I do."

"I'm telling you now if I ever come across this Todd guy he's gonna get his ass whipped." Ryan said.

"I didn't know that you would protect Summer like that." Seth said surprised

"No man has the right to hit a woman." Ryan told him looking down.

"Let's go out." Seth said

"Why?" Ryan asked leaning back on the couch

"I just think I want to do something."

Marissa and Summer in Marissas apartment:

"God, men can be such asses, they think that they know everything." Summer said leaning back on the couch. Little Seth just laid down for a nap.

"Do you think that Seth could be right?" Marissa asked

"About him being little Seth's dad?" Summer took a deep breath

"Yeah." Marissa said turning to face her best friend

"I don't know. I mean, I don't remember what happened in that car." Summer confessed. "I hardly remembered that he came to visit."

"I think that you and Seth were kind of fated to be together, and maybe Little Seth is what will bring you back."

"Oh god Coop!" Summer rolled her eye "Seth and I are old news. NOTHING will happen with us again, I screwed up…" Summer said her voice raised as though she were about to cry.

"Yeah but you may be giving him the thing that you took away." Marissa said referring to little Seth and the aborted baby. "Can I ask you a question though?" Marissa asked

"Anything."

"How come you didn't abort Little Seth too?" Marissa asked rather bluntly lowering her voice…

"Honestly, I don't think that I could go through it again. And when Todd found out he was so excited… I thought that a baby would change him… I couldn't hurt him the same way that I did Seth." Summer said, tears slipping down her face.

"And if Little Seth turns out to be Seth's?" Marissa asked

"I guess Seth will be getting what he wanted eh?"

Marissa looked down and nodded unsure of what that exactly meant.

Seth and Ryan walk up the stairs of the apartment. They go to Marissas door and knock. She answers.

"Seth, Ryan." She said closing the door behind her as she stepped out. "I thought I said that I would stop by."

"I need to talk to Summer REALLY quick;ly." Seth said. "Please?" He begged.

Marissa rolled her eyes and opened the door.

"Seth, Ryan…" She said

Ryan noticed for the first time that she did not call him Chino.

"Hi Summer." Seth said.

"Hey." Ryan said.

"Hey." Summer said to both guys staring at them.

Seth stepped forward.

"Um…" He said pulling a box out of the bag. "I got these for Little Seth." He said. They were a pair of new Sneakers. Seth had never had never had a new pair before. "And these." He said pulling out a pair of high top Converses.

"Um… Todd?" Summer said as she wiped down the kitchen counter with Little Seth on her hip…

"What?" Todd responded.

That tone… it was the same one that her father had used with her when she was a young girl and he had not wanted to be bothered by her…

Summer being caught in her day dream didn't respond to Todd.

"WHAT!" He said more irritated this time.

"It's just that… well, Seth needs more shoes…" Summer said continuing to clean the counter.

"No." Was all that he said not turning back to the TV.

Summer knew better than to mention she needed more shoes as well. She could almost feel the floor through the soles…

"I can't even squeeze his foot into them…" Summer said a little firmer

"Are you talking back to me." Todd said getting up from the couch, tossing the remote across the room.

"No…" She said turning to face him, backing up against the counter, still holding Little Seth… Summer suddenly got a burst of courage… but it turns out that that same courage is what usually got her into trouble… "Well I didn't make him on my own!" Summer said through gritted teeth.

It was then that a hand was raised above her head… she couldn't remember anymore after that…

"You didn't have to do that, you don't even know if he's yours." Summer said looking at her feet.

"It doesn't matter. I saw he needed more today, I got them. Besides if I'm not his father I'm gonna be the best damn uncle he's got." He said smiling.

"Hey!" Ryan said "Can I be the second best damn uncle?" He asked

"Oh, look who got a sense of humor of their time out." Marissa said laughing at Ryan, who in turn rolled his eyes.

"Thanks Seth." Summer said smiling

"It's my way of saying sorry earlier." Seth confessed.

"There's no need Cohen." She said smiling.

**AW! The gang is back together!**


	12. Only know what they've had

**Short chap. Begins sweet, it ends kind of angsty. I hope you like it. Not the best but not the worst. READ AND REVIEW!**

** XOXO Jules**

Chapter 12: "Only know what they have"

The next morning Marissa had to go to work. She took Ryan to give him a tour of the shelter. That left Summer and little Seth at Marissa's apartment, and Seth at his place.

"Alright, do you remember what you are going to do?" Summer asked as she fixed little Seths overalls, and red T-shirt.

"Yea!" He said smiling looking down proudly at his new red converse shoes.

"Alright, go on then." Summer said giving Seth a light push down the hall.

Seth knocked repeatedly on the door, a lop-sided grin on his face. Seth opened the door, and looked around, he didn't see anyone until little Seth tapped on his knee. Seth jumped back when he looked down, seeing a miniature version of himself.

"Hi." Little Seth said smiling

"Hi." Seth said picking him up.

"Thank you for my shoe." He said pointing to his shoe.

"Yeah buddy." He said as he carried little Seth back to the hall where Summer stood waiting.

She smiled. Seth tried to look away from the bruises on her face.

"Hey Seth." She said.

"Hi." Both Seths said at the same time.

"That's going to get a little confusing." Seth said laughing.

"Eh, just call him Ryder, he'll answer to it."

"Ryder?" Big Seth asked

"Yeah, it's his middle name. He'll answer to it. I'd call him either. I only call him Seth because of you. I'm not particularly fond of the name." Summer said mischievously blushing.

"Well gee thanks." Seth said shifting Little Seth… or Ryder of that matter to his other arm.

"Seth Ryder Hanson…" Summer said.

"Well you never know, Seth Ryder Cohen." Seth said smiling.

Summer looked down and nodded

"We should really get that straightened out." Summer said

"I already made plans." Seth said.

"Oh you did?" Summer asked surprised.

"Yeah, for tomorrow actually. There's a clinic downtown that can give us the results in two days." Seth informed her. He fixed Seths overalls.

"Haha, those are his trade mark pants." Summer said

"Why is that." Seth asked holding up the child above his face.

"Because, anything else he wears looks like he is planning for a flood." Summer confessed.

"Ah, then to the mall we must go." Seth said

"Seth Cohen? Talking about going to the MALL!" She said in disbelief

"Yes, for my potential son I will travel into the belly of the beast."

"The beast being?" Summer asked

"Teenage girls sporting in Louis Vutton bags, toting daddy's bank card."

"You just described me as a teenager." Summer said kicking him.

"I know that I did. Come on, close up shop. We're heading out."

They shopped around the mall for an hour until Seth was satisfied… well almost.

"One more thing." Seth said

"What is that?" Summer asked raising her eyebrow

"We bought something for mini me, but I want to get his mother something." Seth said

"NO! Letting you buy my child stuff was enough, but me? No." Summer said holding up her hand.

Little Seth was holding one of Summers hands, and one of Seths walking in between them.

"Since when do you not like to be pampered?"

"Since I grew up." Summer said airily

Seth nodded

"Well that sucks for you because since I grew up I found that I love to pamper so you're stuck with me."

"Oh please Seth you always pampered me!" Summer said rolling her eyes

"That's because I love you." Seth said causing Summer to stop dead in her tracks.

"How can you still love me after what I put you through?" Summer said, her voice quivering.

"I don't know." Seth said shrugging picking up little Seth. "I just do." He said

Summer stopped.

_ It was Todd's birthday. She had spent all day baking him cake. Little Seth and She had spent hours cleaning as well. The apartment had never shined so brightly._

_"SURPRISE!" Little Seth yelled when he walked through the door._

_"What the hell is this?" Todd asked_

_"It's for your birthday honey." Summer said coming over and giving him a kiss._

_ Todd looked at the cake and pushed it off the table and went over to Summers purse taking out what little money she had._

_"For my birthday I'm going to get a real woman."_

_ And with that he left. Summer fought back tears._

_"I love you." Little Seth whispered in her ear._

_"I love you too baby."_

_ She looked at the cake on the linoleum floor and handed little Seth a fork. Seth looked down at the cake._

_" 'S dirty." He said._

_"We cleaned so much earlier, I think it will be okay." Summer said kissing her son._

_ And together they ate the cake that had fallen to the floor like hope of something better._

** I'm not sure if I said or not. The chapter lyrics to this story are from a Jack Johnson song Mediocre Bad Guys. Check it out. It is on the CD "On and On"**


	13. And they have only what they've seen

** Alright, hey guys. Sorry I haven't updated recently. I have been so stressed. PLEASE review and give me motivation to keep on going. Ah! Anyway, I am going to FL soon, and I wanted to get one or two chapters up of each of my stories before I do so... yeah... here it goes. Please review!**

**xoxo Jules**

Chapter 13: "And they have only what they've seen"

That night Ryan and Seth sat on Seth's couch playing Grand Theft Auto like old times, but the difference was that Ryan was actually beating Seth. Something was up, Ryan thought shutting off the game system.

"What's going on?" Ryan asked

"Nothing, why?" Seth asked focusing on the screen again.

"Cause, the Cop was totally on your ass and you just stood there." Ryan said.

Seth leaned back on the couch and shrugged.

"Summer?" Ryan asked

Seth shrugged again.

"Well shrugging not gonna make the problem go away." Ryan said shoving Seth in the shoulder.

"I just don't know her anymore." Seth said. "She used to love going to the mall, or my bying her things, and now… I donno."

"She's been through a lot man. I mean, she got beaten up like everyday from what Marissa told me." Ryan said

"What was the deal with all that?" Seth asked

"I don't know, Marissa wouldn't go into it. Chicks before dicks was how I believe she put it." Ryan said smiling at the thought of Marissa.

"Nice." Seth said sarcastically. "Women are so complicated."

"Well once you get to the good sex you're alright." Ryan said looking at Seth

"Um, this to a guy who has gotten his girlfriend pregnant possibly twice!" Seth said pointing out the irony or Ryans statement to him.

"Point taken." Ryan said. "So are you into her again?" Ryan asked

Seth shrugged.

"Summer's a great girl, she always has been, but she screwed up when she didn't tell me about the abortion." Seth said. "That hurt me."

"But you too have a child now." Ryan said.

"It's not the same." Seth said walking back to his room to retire for the night. "Night Ryan."

"Night." Ryan said lying back on the couch reliving his day with Marissa.

Marissa's apartment

"So how have things been going with Seth?" Marissa asked from where she was snuggled up on the couch under a blanket with Summer sipping tea as they used to.

"Alright I guess." Summer said becoming fascinated with her tea. "Seth made plans, tomorrow we're going to get a paternity test."

"Really?" Marissa said raising her eyebrows.

Summer nodded.

"You nervous?" Marissa asked

Summer thought for a second.

"It's all happening so fast. I just never thought that there was a possibility of anyone else being Little Seth's dad. I don't even remember sleeping with him." Summer said her voice fading off.

"So when do you get the results?" Marissa asked

"Two days." Summer said simply.

Marissa decided to change the topic. Of course the new topic wasn't lighter, but it was something that had to be brought up.

"I was just wondering, I mean, no pressure, but are you going to press charges against Todd?" Marissa asked looking at Summer who was looking away from her.

"You don't know him Coop. If I did that he's going to come after me." Summer said

"No he won't he'll be in jail!" Marissa tried to tell her

"But what if he doesn't get locked up? Or what is going to happen when he gets out? I can't risk it. It's not safe. And he KNOWS the only way that he can really hurt me is by hurting my child. He's going to go right for little Seth when he finds us and I am NOT willing to risk it." Summer said.

Marissa was taken aback. Summer had never really cared about anything in her life, accept for her friends, well actually only Marissa, and then there was Seth and Ryan, but it was different with them.

"People can protect you Summer." Marissa said

Summer stood up from the couch.

"Only I can protect little Seth and I. It's no-one else's business." Summer said walking back toward the room that she and little Seth were sharing.

Little Seth was lying in the middle of the bed. He was wearing the new Bob the Builder pajamas that Seth had bought for him that day. It was the only thing that he had that fit him for so long. He was sleeping so peacefully. He never slept that peacefully when they lived with Todd. Summer had to protect him… by any means necessary. Summer crawled into the bed next to the little boy and curled her arms around him. He sank into his mothers chest comfortably. And there in that bed, in that position she cried soft tears into his messy curls.

Summer woke up the next morning alone. She panicked for a second when she realized that her son was not beside her.

She wandered out to the living room where Seth, Marissa, and Ryan were sitting on the couch watching Sesame street, little Seth curled up on Marissa's lap attentively watching the show.

Summer smiled at the scene.

"Good morning." Summer said as she walked in.

"Sssshhhhh!" Seth warned her. "You are depriving my child of much needed learning!" Seth said leading Summer out of the room, leaving Ryan and Marissa laughing about something in the living room. "The test is at noon."

"I remember." Summer said rolling her eyes

"What's with the attitude?" Seth asked

"Cohen you know I'm not a morning person." She said leaning against the kitchen counter.

Times when Summer said things like that Seth believed that there was a little bit of the old Summer left in there, behind that brick wall of bruises and scars.

"I just want you to know if little Seth is mine I'm going to be there for him when he needs me, and when he doesn't." Seth said "You too."

"I'm a big girl Cohen. I can take care of myself." Her eyes met Seth's as she spoke

"I know." Seth said kissing her cheeks and then leaving the apartment.

Ryan and Marissa smiled, they had watched the whole exchange in the reflection of the T.V.

"Do you think that they'll hook up?" Marissa asked smiling at Ryan.

"I hope so." Ryan said. "Seth is the WORST brooder."

Marissa smiled. She left the butterflies that she had for Ryan so many years ago.

"What?" Ryan asked noticing Marissa's smile.

"I was sitting on the en of my driveway waiting for Luke to pick me up… you walked down…" Marissa began

"You were smoking." Ryan said smiling at her

"So were you." Marissa said playfully as they reminisced. "You looked so sad."

"You looked so beautiful." Ryan said. Since when did he get a sentimental side?

"I've missed this." Marissa said scooting over resting her head on his shoulder.

"Me too." Ryan said kissing the top of her head. "Me too." He repeated.


	14. The mediocre bad guys can really bring y...

OMG! I am so totally in love with this chapter I won't say anything else until the end!

xoxo Jules

* * *

Chapter 14: "Them mediocre bad guys can really bring you down"

Summer and Seth waited impatiently in the waiting room of the health clinic. Two days before they had gone and and gotten their mouths swabbed for the DNA test. Now it was time to find out the results.

Ryan and Marissa were back at Marissa's apartment watching little Seth.

"If he's mine we're changing his last name. Seth Hanson, it sounds like he should have long blonde hair and a pair of drum sticks playing "Um Bop"." Seth said winking at Summer.

She smiled, it was the first time that Seth saw her smile in such a long time.

_19 year old Summer Roberts sat on the mattress the new apartment that she and her boyfriend had scrapped together just enough money to get. She looked around the empty room. Todd had gone out to see what furniture he could get from a friend of his that was moving upstate and didn't need his old stuff._

Summer looked around the room. She had no friends, her dad told her not to talk to him again when he found our that she was pregnant. Summer Roberts was completely and utterly alone…well almost.

The baby kicked against her… hard.

"Hey kiddo." Summer said placing her hand on her seven month pregnant belly. The baby kicked again. Summer smiled.

She had come a long way for a little girl that viewed motherhood as a death sentence.

"Seem a little anxious to get out." Summer said. "If I were you I'd stay in there. Not that I enjoy you making me want to eat everything in site, and the swollen feet and all, but your safe…" Summer sighed. "I want to be safe too."

Since Summers mother took her life she had never felt that safety again. Safety came in innocence, innocence which Summer had none of, not after that night, the bloody water. No, Summer would never be innocent again.

"You're going to be a boy." Summer said. She knew it, she felt it. She only went to the doctors once during her pregnancy, it was when she was still in Berkley and she went to the campus clinic. That day they gave her an ultrasound. That day changed her life. From that moment she knew that she had a child growing inside of her that she was supposed to love and protect, and as scary as that was she knew that now she had a responsibility, now she had a reason to go on. Now maybe she could have the child that she was so scared to a mere year before.

"Summer? SUMMER!" Seth said again

"Yeah?" She said snapping her head towards him, she had been lost in her thoughts.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just nervous." Summer admitted.

Seth nodded understanding… Seth had been there for him even though she had wronged him in an unimaginable way. It took her swallowing all of her pride to confess what she was about to.

"I'm sorry Seth, for all of this." She said her eyes filling with tears

"Summer, it's not your fault, you didn't remember." Seth said grabbing her hand and squeezing it lightly.

"No, not that, for what I did before Seth, to our baby…" She said her voice trailing off…

"We can't worry about that right now. We have to worry about Little Seth." Seth said turning away from Summer.

"I just had to say it Seth. I took away something from you that we can never get back, but I just want you to know if I could give it back to you I would." Summer confessed

"You took away my virginity, want to give that back to?" Seth said winking trying to lighten the mood.

"SETH!" She complained "Here I am trying to spill my soul to you and you make fun!" Summer said stomping hard on his foot.

"OW!" Seth cried out in pain. "Rage blackouts, I forgot!"

As soon as he regained composure he began to speak again.

"I know that you feel guilty about the abortion Summer. I do. But if we hold onto all of this stuff from the past where are we going to end up?" Seth said. "I'll tell you, back where we are now, separated for five years and quite frankly completely miserable."

Summer smiled up at him.

"You're miserable too?" She asked

"Well don't seem so happy about that." He said putting his hand on her cheek. She smiled and leaned into his touch. He didn't feel like Todd, he was soft and gentle. It was like with Seth she finally found her home.

Seth smiled down at her one last time before leaning in and kissing her. Summer almost melted beneath him. For the first time in a long time she felt something real… and it was awfully nice.

"I've been wanting to do that since I saw you again lying there asleep in Marissa's bed." Seth confessed.

"I've been wanting to do that since you bought little Seth shoes that matched yours." Summer responded.

"Aw Summer, a sucker for shoes as usual." Seth said teasingly, Summer fake pouted.

"You know what else I've been wanting to do?" Seth asked looking Summer mischievously in the eye.

"What?" Summer asked smiling back

"This." Seth said getting down on one knee.

Summers jaw fell open… Was Seth really proposing.

"I've been wanting to do this since the first day of first grade, you were on the swing with Marissa, I brought you a slug, you smacked it out of my hand. That day I heard your first "ew", and I loved you every "ew" since. I loved you since you left me that birthday card on my 12th birthday. I loved you since you were the only one to talk to me at Alans funeral, and I ran into you that day with my skateboard. I loved you since you loved me." Seth chuckled to himself. "I have loved you my entire life… and so I guess what I am trying to ask you is," Seth pulled a box out of his pocket. "Will you marry me?"

Summer was now bawling. Good thing that she didn't wear make-up that day.

"Yes Seth! Of course!" Summer said wrapping her arms around his neck.

Everyone in the waiting room of the clinic started clapping. The pregnant teens, the street whores with STD's, other angry couples waiting for paternity test results as well.

Seth slipped the engagement ring on Summers finger.

"Perfect fit." Summer said smiling

"Marissa helped me pick it out." Seth said

"COOP KNEW ABOUT THIS!" She said reverting into a 17 year old as she kicked his shin.

"Ow!" Seth said grabbing his leg.

Summer then grabbed his head and kissed him like she never had before.

"I love you Seth."

"I love you too Summer."

The nurse then walked into the waiting room and coughed to get their attention.

"Mr. Cohen? Ms. Roberts?"

"Yes?" They said at the same time spinning around

"We have the results."

* * *

**Hehe, smile, it's what the readers wanted. So there are going to be two more chapters I will try to post them soon. I think I love this story. THANK YOU for sticking around during my long period of writers block. PLEASE review and let me know what you think!**

**And btw, the last chapter they go to Vegas!**

**xoxo JULES!**


	15. They can't be defeated you know

Chapter 15: "They can't be defeated you know"

"We are ready to hear them." Seth said grabbing hold of his fiancées hand.

"To an accuracy of 99.999 percent Seth Cohen, you are the father of the child in question." The nurse said with a smile handing Summer the paper.

"Oh my god!" Summer said tears coming to his eyes as Seth pulled her into a big hug.

To everyone in the waiting room it made no sense watching the two together how they ever got into the situation that would warrant a question of their childs paternity. They looked so perfect together, almost too perfect together.

Seth and Summer walk out of the clinic hand in hand.

"This has been the most amazing day of my life." Summer said smiling up at Seth

"Yeah. Mine too."

Summer unlocks the door to Marissas apartment to find Marissa and Ryan making out on her couch.

"EW" Summer said covering her eyes with her hands.

"Seth, Summer!" Ryan said sitting up on the couch, Marissa did the same fixing her skirt.

"What's the news with little Seth?" Marissa asked

Seth beamed proudly, they didn't even have to answer.

"Congratulations man." Ryan said hugging him

"Oh my god, that is great Sum!" Marissa said pulling her into a hug, and then pulling her hands to survey the ring. "I was right Seth, it's the perfect fit!" Marissa smiled proud of herself.

"You proposed?" Ryan asked his head snapping towards Seth

"What can I say." Seth said smiling

"YOU DIDN'T TELL ME YOU WERE PROPOSING!" Ryan said "Some brother you are." He jokingly mumbled

"Oh yes, now we get to make wedding plans, and a guest list! And we have to find cate-" Summer cut off Marissa.

"Actually I wanted something, I donno, small." Summer said

"But you always said that you wanted a big wedding with like everyone in Newport and it to be held in a huge church and all that." Marissa reminded her

Summer shrugged.

"I also said that I would never have children or get married and I basically screwed over that idea at 19, so." Summer smiled "Besides, as long as the four of you guys are here and little Seth that's all I need." She said playfully pushing Marissa in the shoulder.

"Yeah, I guess that's all I would need too." She said smiling back at her friend as they went off to the kitchen.

"So what's up with you and Marissa man?" Seth asked Ryan sitting down on the couch

"Nothing, I guess we're just back together." Ryan said staring at the T.V screen

"You've missed her haven't you?"

"Yeah man, I have."

The boys suddenly heard a squeal from the kitchen! And then the girls ran in.

"We're getting married in Vegas!" Summer said smiling widely

"Isn't that I donno, a little Britney Spears, Nikki Hilton?" Ryan asked raising an eyebrow.

"Look at your man catching up with the celeb gossip!" Summer said winking at Marissa.

Marissa went up behind Ryan and wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Come on Ryan, it'd be fun." Marissa begged kissing his neck

Ryan looked over at Seth.

"What do you think man?" He asked

Seth rolled his eyes

"It doesn't matter what I think because once our girls have their minds set on something it's final."

Summer sat down on Seth lap and gave him a quick peck.

"I promise you won't regret it!"

---- The next afternoon they were on a plane on their way to Nevada.

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**This chap was really short. It was to set up for the next chapter which I expect to be reletively long.**

**xoxo Jules**


	16. They're never gonna come around

Alright this is the last chapter of Mediocre Bad Guys.... tear. I think this is one of my favorite last chapters. This story was very consistant in the writing, thanks to the reviewers. It is really sad that this story's done... I am like, oh no! Anyhow, I may do a short epilogue, no promises... well then... I guess you should go ahead and read. Please everyone who reads this last chap. review, and let me know what you think....

xoxo Always Jules

You guys are great

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Chapter 16: "They're never going to come around"

Little Seth sat between his mother and father in the cab from the airport to the hotel where they would be staying in Las Vegas. He stared out of the window mystified by the lights of the city.

Summer smiled over at the little boy. He seemed so much happier since they had left Todd. Not only was he happier but he was talking and smiling more, and was attached to Seth at the hip. He also had a special interest in "Aunt Marissa".

Marissa and Ryan were riding to the hotel in another cab. They were going to meet Seth and Summer at the hotel, and then the four plus little Seth were going to go to the chapel. It was late at night already but there was no reason to prolong the marriage anymore.

Marissa tossed her bags on the floor of the hotel.

"Flashbacks to TJ." Ryan said looking around the dingy motel.

"It's last minute." Marissa said plopping down onto the bed. "At least Seth and Summer aren't bitching and moaning this time." Marissa joked cocking a smile Ryan's way.

"Yeah, and we're on speaking terms this time." Ryan joked smiling back

"Um, hello, and whose fault is that? I wasn't the one who was messing around with a whore!" Marissa shot back still smiling

"Well you hooked up with Luke that night and he's a man whore so we're even." He said now tossing his bag down.

"I can't believe that Seth and Summer are really getting married, and they have a kid!" Marissa said as it all sunk in.

"Yeah." Ryan agreed

"I guess it's for the best. I can't even begin to imagine the hell that Summer must have gone through this year." Marissa said sadly

"It's alright." Ryan said pulling Marissa into a hug while lovingly rubbing her back.

They heard a soft buzzing noise.

"That's my phone." Marissa said fumbling around the bed to find the ringing device. She looked down at the screen and then back at Ryan. "I've got to take this, I'll be back." She said blowing him a kiss before exiting.

Seth sat in the room that he shared with Little Seth and Summer. Summer had gone out to get some last minute toiletries that she had forgotten. Seth insisted on staying so he could get Little Seth ready for bed, and tuck them in, just the two of them. They were still going to get married that night, but Seth was getting fussy so they were just going to lay him down for awhile, and then get him up when it was time for the wedding.

"There you go buddy, just right." Seth said slipping Little Seths pajama top on.

Seth smiled down proudly at his new pajamas. He used to just sleep in his underwear or a pull up.

"Where's mommy?" Seth asked

"She'll be back soon." Seth said as he laid little Seth in bed. Seth climbed on the bed next to his son.

"Are you and my mommy friends?" Little Seth asked

"Your mommy and I are good friends. Such good friends we're going to get married!" Seth tried to explain.

The little boy scrunched up his face.

"Daddy doesn't like mommy 'da have friends." The tone of his voice worried.

At the sound of his son calling another man daddy Seth cringed. He was his father. It was just a shame that it took so long to get to this point.

"Todd, wasn't nice to your mommy was he?" Seth asked

"No." Little Seth said in a tiny voice. "He'd make her cry."

"He wasn't nice to you either huh?" Seth asked

Little Seth looked down and shook his head no.

"What would you think if I were your daddy?" Seth asked

Little Seth looked up at him and smiled before wrapping his arms around Seths neck.

"Yeah!" Little Seth said as Seth began to tickle his sides. When his laughing finally ceased he asked the final question. "So you're my daddy now?"

"Yeah kiddo, I am." Seth said pulling Seth into a long tight hug.

Marissa made her way to the side of the hotel and helped her "guests" with their bags.

"I am so glad that you could make it on such short notice." Marissa said as she attempted to lug a large bag into the hotel room. "Seth and Summer are going to be so happy to see you, not to mention Ryan."

"Yeah." Kirsten said putting down the last of her bags and then giving Marissa a hug. "You look good." Kirsten said as she stepped back and looked at the now 23 year old girl.

"Thanks." Marissa said smiling in a childish way taking Kirsten back to the days where she would catch Marissa and Ryan in compromising positions in the pool house. Marissa turned to the door. "Hey Mr. Cohen!" She said giving him a quick hug.

"Hey Marissa." Sandy said smiling at the young girl.

Marissa looked around quickly.

"So you guys have everything you need?" She checked.

"We're great." Sandy said.

"Alright, well I have to get back to my room before Ryan calls a search party." Marissa said smiling.

"Are you and he?" Sandy asked

Marissa just blushed

"Okay." Kirsten said shoving her husband in the side for his bluntness.

"Remember the Elvis chapel right down the street at two!" Marissa reminded them before skipping out. "Summer really wants it to be casual." She added before closing the door.

Hours later Summer and Seth sat in the hotel room.

"I can't believe that we're about to do this." Summer said smiling

"Are you having second thoughts?" Seth asked

"No, not at all." Summer responded looking over to Little Seth on the bed. His dark brown hair curling atop his head.

"Me neither." Seth said "I love you."

"I love you too." Summer said leaning over and kissing Seth. She then walked over to the bed where she untucked the covers from around little Seth, and scooped him up into her arms. "I love you baby." She whispered in the boys ear as he cuddled into her chest and fell asleep.

"Ready to go?" Seth asked as he held the front door open.

"Yeah, I'm ready." Summer said nodding her head.

---- Ryan and Marissa made their way into the chapel.

"Seth and Summer are late." Ryan said glancing at his watch.

"Leave it to them to be late at their own wedding." Marissa joked.

Right then Kirsten cascaded her way across the room towards them.

"Kirsten!" Ryan said in shock pulling his surrogate mother towards him.

It had been since last Chrismakkuah that they had seen one another.

"You're looking good." Kirsten said fixing his shirt collar in a motherly fashion.

"So do you."

Sandy huffed in the corner.

"I don't mind being neglected." He said in a sarcastic tone when Ryan pulled him into a masculine hug.

"I've missed you." Ryan said

"You too." Sandy said. "So, one of my sons is tying the knot, I think it's just about time for the other." Sandy said winking at Ryan and the gesturing towards Marissa who was involved in a very animated conversation with Kirsten.

"Yeah, I was thinking the same thing." Ryan said when the door suddenly swung open to reveal Seth and Summer.

"Mom, Dad?!" Seth said in surprise rushing over and hugging them both. "What, how!" He looked over at Ryan who held his hands up innocently.

"It was all her!" He said pointing to Marissa.

"Hi Mr. Cohen, Mrs. Cohen." Summer said from where she stood behind Seth, little Seth, whose head was resting on her shoulders eyes began fluttering open.

"Who is that?" Kirsten asked pointing to the little boy on Summers shoulder.

"This is my son Seth." Summer said smiling uncertainly.

"Our son." Seth said winking at her.

Kirsten and Sandy both blinked several times trying to believe their ears/eyes.

"Oh, I guess I didn't mention that part." Marissa said from next to Ryan.

"They'll explain later, now it's time for a wedding!" Ryan said putting his hands on the shoulders of his still very shocked parents.

----- Little Seth sat on Marissa's lap as they watched the ceremony unfold. Ryan sat to her side, his hand behind her lightly stroking her hair. Next to him were Sandy and Kirsten who grasped on another's hands, tears streaming down Kirstens face.

She wondered where Seth was… Was he married? Was he still the big goof ball that read comics and played video games from the time he woke up until he went to bed? Was he still the same little boy that had remembered a stupid poem she wrote back at grade school…? Would he be the one who she would run to when she was upset and wrap her up in a protective blanket of… Coheness?

"Do you take this woman to be your wife?" The Elvis impersonator said in the most phony "King" voice any of them had ever heard

"I do."

Summer lay on the floor, she felt purple and bruised from head to toe… Why had he done this to her. As she drifted in and out of consciousness she thought back to her Newport days… her pre-Todd days

"Do you take this man to be your husband."

"I do." Summer said looking up into the man's eyes that she would love now and forever.

Seth then took her hands in hers and pulled her close to him.

The cut on Summers lip was chapped, she headed to her bag to get some chap stick… When she opened her bag she was surprised by what she found. Inside there was a brown paper bag. Summer opened it slowly and cautiously. Inside there was a fifty dollar bill, and a card for the LA womens shelter…

"I love you Summer." He said staring deeply into her eyes as though for the first time seeing her soul.

Sometimes death seemed easier than life. When you are dead you don't have to worry about being hurt, or hurting other people, you don't have to worry about existing! Sometimes she thought that her mother had the right idea.

"I love you too Cohen."

Both of their eyes brimmed with tears as Seth leaned down and gave Summer a soft gentle kiss. Their first kiss as man and wife…

Sandy, Kirsten, Ryan, and Marissa all stood up and began clapping. Kirsten was nearly sobbing. Little Seth ran up to join his parents.

"Yay!" He said clapping although he didn't really understand the significance of what had just happened.

Summer squealed as she met Marissa with a big hug.

"Oh my god! I can't believe you're married Sum." Marissa said stepping back from the embrace.

Summer glanced over to Ryan who was joking around with the Cohens. He smiled at her in congratulations before returning to his rough housing with Seth.

"It may not be awhile before you are too." Summer said winking at Marissa, who in turn blushed furiously.

"So." Seth said punching Ryan lightly in the shoulder. "How much longer till you pop the question to Cooper?"

Ryan smiled and shrugged

"I donno man. I love her." Ryan said smiling shyly

"Dude, we've all totally wasted these past four years. We should be done with waiting. Besides, you should be used to handcuffs Chino." Seth said grinning and flashing his ring at his brother.

"Yeah man." Ryan said laughing. "I guess you have a point."

Ryan walked over to where Marissa and Summer were standing at the altar.

"Congratulations Summer." Ryan said giving her a polite kiss on the cheek.

Summer looked back and forth between Ryan and Marissa and could sense that they needed to be alone.

"Um, I'm going to go find Little Seth." Summer said excusing herself.

Ryan and Marissa watched Summer, Kirsten, and the three generation of Cohen men from across the room. They were all so happy.

"They're so cute." Marissa said smiling

Ryan looked at Marissa, now a woman of 23, they had all grown up so much, but none the less he loved her the same if not more.

"Look Marissa, I know that you know that I love you but I just wanted to tell you because I have never stopped loving you and you were all that I could think about the last four years, and the seeing you that day at Seths apartment, well I don't know much about fate but I think that was it-" Ryan rambled before being cut off by his better half.

"Ryan, what are you getting at? You're beginning to sound like Seth." Marissa said giving her trademark smile and placing her hand on his shoulder.

"Will you marry me?" Ryan asked, his eyes looking concerned for no apparent reason.

"Are you serious?" Marissa asked dropping her hand from his shoulder.

"Um, yeah, I guess I am." Ryan said more confidently. "I know that you're not the type of girl to get married in Vegas on a whim and I get that bu-"

Marissas face breaks out into an all too foolish smile as she pulled Ryan to him and kissed him as she never had before.

---- Five minutes later Seth, Summer, Kirsten, Sandy and Little Seth were sitting in the rows of seats witnessing Ryan and Marissa tie the knot. Kirsten now sobbing after seeing her two boys getting married.

Life never seemed as simple as it did in that moment, and it never would again.

Seth squeezed Summers hand as they watched the second ceremony unfold. Ryan and Marissa, well it took long enough.

Maybe it was good that life was never going to be this simple… if life were always simple, you would never learn. If they hadn't had the time apart they may not appreciate what they have now as much. If Ryan hadn't have been from Chino he would not had grabbed so many opportunities in Newport, if Seth weren't the geek Ryan could have meant nothing to them, if Marissa didn't have such as rocky relationship with Luke she never would have found Ryan, … and if Summer didn't have such a troubled childhood she never would have found herself…

So life was a struggle but a welcome one, one they were ready for.

Summer looked deep into Seths eyes

**_So bring it on_**

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**Ah, so Bittersweet..... Anyhow, thank you once again for sticking with me on these stories... "So bring it on", I thought that was a good way to end it. Most of the time stories end with everything being perfect, but this one's not. There are still loose ends, I intended to do that. Anyhow PLEASE REVIEW. Check out the song Mediore Bad Guys by Jack Johnson too and let me know what you think**

**xoxo Jules**

** Music By: Jack Johnson from _"On and On"_**


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